Renowned Autism Expert Dr. Tony Attwood Realizes His Adult Son Has Asperger’s Syndrome
Twelve years ago, I went to an all-day conference in Seattle featuring Australian Dr. Tony Attwood, the world’s foremost authority on Asperger’s Syndrome. Listening to one person for that many hours seemed like it would be an ordeal, but he was so informative, engaging and enlightening that it was a joy. To this day, I recall his anecdotes and pearls of wisdom. For instance, an audience member asked if they should homeschool their child. He advised using homeschooling strategically, “Save it for middle school, because kids in middle school are animals, and that’s being unkind to animals.”
At another point, Dr. Attwood was nonplussed by our glazed expressions when he invoked the autism public health nurse assigned to each Australian child upon diagnosis. They guide and support the child through young adulthood. “Don’t you have anything like that here?” he exclaimed as we all shook our heads “no.”
“This is a wealthy city! What do you people spend your money on?!” (Sports stadiums and over-priced coffee are two things).
Dr. Attwood’s description of Asperger’s as the next evolution of mankind was thrilling. Out-of-the-box thinkers needed to solve earth’s most pressing problems. Autism as a point pride instead of pity. He became my North Star to guide me in raising my twin sons with Asperger’s. I later had personal communication with him when he posted my poem about autism on his website.
So when I recently read that he has a 35-year-old son named Will who has had addiction issues and served two years in jail for burglary, it caught my attention. While he and his daughter were watching family videos of himself and Will as a four-year-old, Professor Attwood noticed his own inability to connect with him.
“I was trying to interact with him, but even at the age of four, there was a barrier,” Professor Attwood said. “[My daughter] Rosie is a teacher of kids with autism and we just turned to each other and said, ‘He’s Asperger’s!'”
What a shock it must have been to realize what was hiding in plain sight all along. Thirty five years ago, there was no language for Asperger’s. “We just thought he was a naughty, ADHD, difficult, emotional kid,” recounted Dr. Attwood. Crippling anxiety often leads to self medication with drugs and alcohol for individuals with Asperger’s, which then can escalate to addiction. Sadly, a common fate.
Will Attwood finds peace with his diagnosis as if the puzzle pieces of his life finally fall into place. He bears no bitterness towards his father for not realizing his condition sooner. He is now writing a book to help people with Asperger’s who are in prison. Dr. Attwood finds his son’s new calling heroic.
In raising my own sons, I’ve experienced many regrets, opportunities missed and mistakes made. Often the “what-ifs” have haunted me. So I find personal solace and a measure of peace from Dr. Attwood revealing his own family odyssey. I admire and respect his bravery in going public, an act that reverberates positively in ways he cannot imagine.